It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,"What are you charged with?"

"Doing my Christmas shopping early", replied the defendant.

"That's no offense", said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?"

"Before the store opened."

BAD DAY

You know it's going to be a bad day when your teenager knocks on your bedroom door first thing in the morning and says, "Today is Nerd Day at school, Pop. Can I borrow some of your clothes?"

THREE DAY STAY

A cowboy rides into town on Friday, stays three days and leaves on Friday.
How does he do it?

The horse's name is Friday