Hi.
This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my Financial
aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my
friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry I have
plenty of money.
Hi.
John's answering machine is broken. This is the refrigerator. Please
speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one
of these magnets.
Hello,
you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets
are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not
need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name
and number and they will get back to you.
This
is not an answering machine this is a telepathic thought recording
device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling
and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning
your call.
Hi.
I am probably home. I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave
me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
Hi,
this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave
a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.
If
you are a burglar, then we're probably home cleaning our weapons
right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't
home and it's safe to leave a message.
Please
leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything
you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
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